To Learn to Meditate, Focus on Your Breath

I have several friends who have told me that they "can't learn to meditate." When I ask what they mean, they tell me that when they sit quietly with their eyes closed, all kinds of thoughts go through their mind. Therefore, they "can't meditate."

Most people who start a centering practice of some kind, such as a sitting meditation, find that random thoughts run through their mind. Having thoughts is what our everyday "mind" is about, so that experience is not surprising. It's what meditation teachers call our "monkey" mind...it will run all over the place and most often take us where we don't want to go.

But a daily centering practice that helps us calm that monkey mind has so many benefits that it's worth returning to your mat, cushion or chair time and time again. Each time you sit, finding a comfortable position with a straight spine, close your eyes... and then, instead of pushing your thoughts away, give yourself permission to observe them. Watch them come...and then let them go. And before the next random thoughts come up, focus on your breath.

There's no need to change the quality of your breathing...just watch it come into the nose and out of the nose. To keep you attention there, you can say to yourself: "I am breathing in..." and then: "I am breathing out."

We all breathe, most of the time in a shallow way and without giving it a thought. But sitting and breathing mindfully is a simple way to start a centering practice. Begin with just 3 to 5 minutes every morning. Then observe how the practice changes the way you feel during your day.

Following your breath is the simple part. Getting to the mat or cushion is harder. But once you begin and notice how centered you feel as you start the busi-ness of the day, you just might want to increase your time there to 15 or 20 minutes...and soon you'll be able to say: "I have a meditation practice."

Cloud 9 Looks at Passion Over 60

If you live in New York or Los Angeles, you might want to check your local theaters for the opening of a German film on Friday, August 14th (NY) or Friday, August 28th (LA).

CLOUD 9 won the German equivalent of the Academy Award for Best Actress for Ursula Werner. She portrays Inge, a 67 year old happily married seamstress who falls madly in love with a 76 year old customer. They begin a passionate love affair that is as physical as it is emotional.

What a courageous performance by Werner, who puts everything right out there on the screen. Watching her scenes of love-making with all the wrinkles and sags in full view was amazing. She was so believable, I felt embarrassed, as if I was watching a woman I knew reveal a secret that was too private to share.

Werner's powerful performance was complemented by Horst Westphal, who plays her handsome lover. And Horst Rehlberg, who plays her husband of 30 years, shows the disbelief,anger and deep sadness that one would expect. When he says to Inge: "I thought we were past anything like this" he seemed to be speaking for a society that rarely admits that age doesn't diminish the capacity to fall in love...butterflies in the stomach, joyful orgasm and all.

Director Andreas Dresen did a brilliant job and deserved his German Film Award for Best Direction.

In the end, Inge regrets the pain her affair has caused her husband and cries out to him: "I didn't ask for this" several times. But in one honest admission to her supportive daughter, she admits she always hoped that she would fall in love once more in her lifetime. A longing that no doubt resides in many female hearts, over 60 or not.

Planting the First Seeds

First Lady Michelle Obama is a revolutionary! She's leading the way to a new American diet, one that's organic, local and healthy.

By bringing children into the White House garden to harvest the early veggie crop and to help cook their own lunch this week, Michelle Obama is inspiring others to look at the health implications of our national food policies.

She pointed out that nearly one third of our children are obese and that roughly the same percentage will eventually have diabetes. She said "those numbers are unacceptable." She called for new menus and food sources for school lunch and breakfast programs, where many American kids get most of their daily nutrition.

It's so heartening to see a First Lady who sees the crisis we're in and who will be a big influence in reaping a healthier, more promising future for our nation. Go Michelle!